playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
