the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Randomize
