So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
