this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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