Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize