Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
