Duck Duck Cougar?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize