Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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