I just made out with a guy for $7.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize
