why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
