I have demons in me.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
