Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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