Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize