so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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