Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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