someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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