even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
