don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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