That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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