just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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