it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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