Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize