The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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