I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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