SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
