I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
i think i scared a bird with my dick
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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