Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize