fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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