the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
