No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
