His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I am available for nakedness
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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