we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
