Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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