she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Its about making memories worth repressing
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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