you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
