So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
