Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Randomize