i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
The air was thick with penises
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
