How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
