they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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