I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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