Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
