i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize