This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
