I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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