I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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