ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
