I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
