Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Randomize
