Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
